I'm 22 hours away from the first step to what I hope will be the greatest year of my life so far. I know the importance of gratitude, but it feels like just saying thank you is not nearly enough. I don't believe in God, but it's impossible to say I don't feel helped and protected. I've felt that at some very important moments throughout my life. And whatever is doing that, it needs to be acknowledged.
Whatever made me have the father who made it all possible. He is supporting half of this financially, but much more importantly, he believes in what I'm doing. And this belief helped me believe it. He was the first to say it wasn't crazy to go. And that is the only reason I'm going. If it weren't for those first words, over 3 months ago, I wouldn't even have allowed myself to dream it. So, first and foremost, thank you dad. For believing in me, supporting me, and most of all, making me the person I am today. I'm proud of who I am, and that's because of you.
Secondly, I'm thankful for the wonderful friends I have. A year ago, I remember thinking I didn't have anyone to talk to if I needed. Today, this has changed.
I have rekindled my friendship with a very old and wonderful friend, and her and her husband have been incredibly helpful throughout this whole process. This whole antecipation is a lot less scary because of you. I feel completely ready to go because o fyou. But even more important than that, we all have so much fun. I'm truly grateful for all the great times we shared this year. You guys are awesome!
I'm also grateful for my online friends. Some people might say that virtual relationships aren't 'real', but to me they are. You guys have helped me so much these past months. Because of you I never feel lonely, and I feel understood. We all share our love for series and music, and mostly that's how it started, but today I'd say I feel we share love. Honest love, coming from people who can't gain anything from each other, other than companionship and friendship. And I'll always treasure that. You guys are amazing!
All of you, I love you with all my heart.
Last but not least, I'm grateful for all the random people, from ex-teachers, ex-bosses, new friends and family, who didn't owe me anything, but helped me anyway. You, too, made all that possible.
I'm writing all this, hoping that making all this public it becomes more meaningful. Because it's not enough to say thanks just inside my head. And I want, I need, whoever or whatever is helping me to know that none of it is taken for granted, and it won't be forgotten.
I can only hope to be able to enjoy every minute of it, learn and improve as much as humanly possible, so one day I can pay it all forward, with interest.
6 months ago